Not So Alone

I've had a rough week. I wasn't sure I wanted to blog about this, cuz I like to post blogs that are up-beat and far removed from being all emo. BUT, it's MY blog..and sometimes, being honest about what's going on in your life might make someone else feel a little normal, or maybe even a little better. With that said, let me brief you. Sometimes, it's just damn hard to 25. It's like the in-between/not so in-between stage of being a real adult. I feel like I blinked and all of a sudden I'm married, with a mortgage, an animal kingdom, car payment, bills galore, and oh yah, and I work 2 (emotional and time consuming) jobs. Oh hey life, shit just got REAL. 

Ok, so, sometimes, because I'm female, I actually get emotionally drained (nature of my jobs) and overwhelmed. And when I get overwhelmed, I get stressed. When I get stressed, I get frustrated, mad and cry. And by that point, I start getting upset about things that aren't even relevant to what originally triggered my little girl breakdown. Then I get mad at Jared, or anyone who actually gives a shit about me. So, now that I'm sounding like PMSing psycho, let's be honest- this is actually kinda normal...right? riiiiiighttt?! This is my blog, and therefore, I say it's normal..

Well, I suppose to a degree, this is ok. If it happens over and over, maybe it's not as "normal," and you  need to seek real help. However, in most cases, I talk people through breakdowns all the time- friends, family, clients, and strangers at Trader Joes (for some reason, people just feel like they can tell me anything...I'm practically a hair dresser...men, I know you don't understand that reference). 

I'm out of my funk now so I can write about it, but it debilitated my  mental state for about a week. I didn't have the energy to get out of bed and workout, the dedication to eat well and I stayed kinda distant from everything. I developed the F-everything attitude. Which seriously isn't normal for me. It's so easy to go through the motions and fake it so that people don't think twice about how you're actually doing. It's WAY too easy to get caught up in comparing your life, your appearance, your job, your relationships, your family, the list could go on forever, to other people. When you're in a funk, it's even easier to lose every ounce of confidence you've worked toward building. One word, one action that probably wouldn't even make you think twice on a "normal" day, tends to be what pushes you overboard when you're in that mental state. 

What I'm hoping to convey is, it always gets better. Sometimes the storm lasts a day, week, a few months, and for some people, it can be an on-going battle. I guess it's just comforting to know that it's ok, that you aren't alone, that people of all different backgrounds and journeys go through the same feelings and experiences. We all experience stress, anxiety, depression, and relationship issues with significant others, family and friends. Every single person has something going on beyond what meets the eye. It's learning how to deal with it, how to move on, how to make it better that becomes the hardest part. I waited it out in hopes of acquiring peace, and while doing so, talked with my best friend for comfort, addressed the issues face to face to find a solution, and when these steps were taken, it was over. I felt better. I moved on. 

AND NO- this seriously just isn't an attack of PMS! Shut up, men!

So, when I saw this picture today, it resonated with  me. And apparently, it resonated with a lot of other people on my facebook page. Not that facebook really means anything, but I'm friends with a wide variety of people...some people that I don't even have a whole lot of interaction with. These friends really seemed to connect with the message. I can't help but feel that this is a common theme, a common feeling among us all. It's hard to stay strong, it's hard to stay confident and focused. Sometimes you need to be reminded that you're not perfect and that it's ok. Embrace all that you are and are not, because we've all been there and felt that.